Archive | September 2015

The Storm

Today the pain came in full force

I let it enter in without resisting it

The pain of a thousand lifetimes

The feeling of having failed

Of profound hurt and disappointment

I let it all come crashing down upon me

I felt it flow through every cell of my body

Even my heart

Which up until now

I had always tried to protect

I watched as its endless flow of torment continued

Allowing it in all of its intensity

Like the wrath of a cruel god

Blowing through the heart of the earth.

For an eternity it continued

Until

Little by little

I came to realize

that the storm had blown itself out.

I saw how I had somehow remained standing the whole time.

Had I resisted

The hurricane would have grabbed hold of me

And dashed me against the rocks

But instead

There was nothing for it to grasp in its evil talons

And I like the ether

Open

Remained present

while the storm in all of its furry

Moved not a hair on my head.

And so I stand now

Having felt fear, anger, sadness, longing

The entirety of human emotion

Flow through me unabated

And in this way been released from the cruel masters

A power that was never real but only imagined.

Having seen the smile re-emerge

Heard the mighty laughter ring forth

I have triumphed

I have conquered

By opening the door to allow defeat and total annihilation to enter

And finding the only thing that was destroyed

Was their power over me.

That I have emerged victorious

Proudly displaying all of my scars and wounds from battle

With the glow of loving kindness

Radiating from my entire being

For all to see.

I am.

Amen.     Wakefield, Sept. 18th, 2015  5:45 am

Ode to the old gang (a tribute to my friends from high school)

So many memories
stirring
touching
all the broken parts of me
the yearnings
for love and acceptance
to discover who and what I am
to live my dreams
discovering
the richness
the love we share
for ourselves and each other
how every one of us
was there for each other
how we laughed and cried
together as one
how we touched so many lives
how in this way
we truly lived
and laid the foundation
to go out into the world
to play our part
in the lives of others
to love
and be loved
to grow and discover
who we truly are
to come home again
to this wonderful community
of goofballs and jokers,
philosophers,
fun times
laughter
and the odd deep profound moments
like with life
each one and each experience
playing a role
on our journey together
Thank you to each one of you
Thank you for the new people
you have brought into our community
into our world
May our lives
and the lives of others
be touched and blessed
with the love and acceptance
we have for each other
May our hearts be opened
and healed from any pain
we and our loved ones carry
May we experience
the richness and mystery of life
and let the emotion
of this moment
move through us
from the top of our head
to the bottoms of our feet
how good it feels
to let that love and oneness
flow through us
opening up
anything we have closed
releasing everything we have blocked
or hidden
stepping forth into
new beginnings
coming full circle
to where we have
always been
Thank you my friends and family
For each and every one of you
for who and what you are, have been
and are yet to be.
Blessed be.
Sat Aug 8, 2015 7:30 am Mississauga

You

Today I came to see you

To look into your eyes

To feel your presence

To feel the emotion

That I feel when I behold you

From that state of “non-interpretation”

Without using my mind to ascribe meaning or significance

There is only the raw / unprocessed

Stream or flow of

Energy / life force / love

That is there

In every song, word, movement, interaction

Waiting to be felt, experienced

And when I behold you while in this state of being

This state of allowing myself to feel

The entire flow of data

Becoming an open receptor

Where the entire river flows through me uncensored

Both in and out without grasping hold on to any particular bit of data

Without needing my conscious mind

To interpret anything

What an extraordinary feeling

To be in this state

This state of rapture

Which comes from allowing this flow.

And from this state

Allowing my dreams to return

To take hold of them like a sword

a beacon of light

Holding them out high in front of me

For all to see

As I launch out

Into a new beginning.

I am alive

I receive this life that is given to me

I accept my mission

My dream.

And the message comes

That all that I need is here.

Aug. 29th, 2015.  6:30 am Wakefield.

As so the lesson is that the voice of fear is only one of many, being part of the flow of information. It is no longer seen as a cruel master, simply being one of the many tools which the true commander of our lives, i.e. ourselves, has at their disposal.